|"Whose Appy Now?"|
|Season 3, Episode 14|
|Air date||February 6, 1997|
|Written by||Neal Baer|
|Directed by||Felix Enriquez Alcala|
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"The Long Way Around"
Whose Appy Now is the 14th episode of the third season of "E.R." It was first aired on February, 6 1997. It was written by Neal Baer and directed by Felix Enriquez Alcala.
Doug treats a dying 17-year old cystic fibrosis patient who doesn't want to be resuscitated. Carter gets to operate Benton.
Mark Greene has gone on a dating binge and he finds himself juggling three women. Things get sticky when it turns out two of them know one another and all three meet in the ER. Dr. Benton is in a funk and John Carter tells him he is joining Dr. Hicks' surgical team. Carter reacts with glee when Benton has to have his appendix removed and Hicks lets him perform the operation. With Carol Hathaway still under suspension, the ER isn't functioning quite as smoothly as it normally does. Jeanie finally gives in to Greg's repeated requests and agrees to go out on a date.
- Anthony Edwards as Mark Greene
- George Clooney as Doug Ross
- Noah Wyle as John Carter
- Julianna Margulies as Carol Hathaway
- Gloria Reuben as Jeanie Boulet
- Laura Innes as Kerry Weaver
- Eriq La Salle as Peter Benton
- The night before beginning to shoot this episode, George Clooney called the writer of the episode notifying him he sprained his ankle playing basketball that day and they had to rewrite pieces of the episode.
Nurse Wendy Goldman: This pamphlet says that 40% of all doctors don't wash their hands between patients.
Dr. Doug Ross: No kidding.
Nurse Wendy Goldman: Yeah. And medical personnel pick their noses on average of three times an hour. And many interns only bathe twice a week -
Dr. Doug Ross: [interrupting] Wendy, there's a limit on how well-informed I want to be.
Dr. Angela Hicks: Change in plans. Simon's got the gunshot. We're doing the appy.
Dr. John Carter: The appy?
Dr. Angela Hicks: Disappointed?
Dr. John Carter: Yeah. They're kind of boring.
Dr. Angela Hicks: You haven't seen the patient yet.
[Carter looks out the window and sees Dr. Benton being wheeled down the hall on a gurney]
Dr. John Carter: Ohhhhhhhh there is a God!
Jerry Markovic: This is ridiculous. I do not need hand-washing lessons!
Dr. Greg Fischer: Scrub hard Jerry, to scrape off the bacteria.
Jeanie Boulet: But the most important thing is to wash your hands after you go to the bathroom.
Jerry Markovic: What, every time?
[Dr. Carter is performing an appendectomy on Dr. Benton]
Dr. John Carter: I am ready to close.
Dr. Angela Hicks: Nice work, Carter.
Dr. John Carter: Thanks. Maybe I'll staple my name into his belly.
Nurse Chuny Marquez: I thought you had a date.
Dr. Mark Greene: Canceled.
Nurse Chuny Marquez: They busted you?
Dr. Mark Greene: They busted me.
Nurse Chuny Marquez: Men are so stupid. How many women were you dating when you were with me?
Dr. Mark Greene: Just you.
Nurse Chuny Marquez: Really?
Dr. Mark Greene: Yeah, you know, except for that night when my neighbor, the ballerina, broke up with her boyfriend. You know, I had to comfort her.
Nurse Chuny Marquez: Yeah, so that was like a public service.
Dr. Mark Greene: Yeah, other than that, I was totally faithful.
Nurse Chuny Marquez: Oh, I feel blessed.